Archive for April, 2005

Of pets and children

Saturday, April 30th, 2005

everyone - well almost - who’ve known that i keep a python for a pet have asked if i have been bitten. I’ved always responded "yes, but I have learned to tell when it will strike".

"when?" they would ask excitedly.

"when you least expect it" I’d answer dryly.

This reminds me…

As I have discovered lately, that just like the abovementioned - I think I can back my claim: parents have fully understood the ways of their children when they finally give up and accept that they know nothing about them.

…or maybe its just me…I hope, with their help, this view of mine will change for the better before they turn into ‘teens’

Right now maximum tolerance is enforced and it is being run by paternal care instinct…or love.

iskul bukol

Thursday, April 28th, 2005

ano ba ang punto ng teacher na nagpapa-research o nagbibigay ang assignment sa mga estudyante na alam naman nya na pupunta lang ang mga bata sa internet at mag-copy-paste na karamihan sa kaniala ay ni hindi man lang binabasa ang nagawa. Meron pang iba na pinapalitan na lang ang pangalan sa ’submitted by:’ sa mga nauna nang nagawa? eh, alam pala naman nya na walang maitutulong ang pinapagawa nya sa pagkatuto(may ganito bang word?) ng estudyante- maliban sa pagkamulat ng mga bata sa kahalagahan ng walang katuturang gastusin - bakit pa rin nya ito patuloy na pina-praktis?

ano ba ang punto ng teacher at hindi na nya binabasa ang mga isi-nubmit na research work ng mga estudyante - na alam din ito ng mga bata kaya kahit anu-ano nalang ang ipinaglalalagay sa papel? eh, ipina-assignment nya bakit hindi nya basahin?

eto sagot: hindi na binabasa ng teacher ang ipinagawa dahil alam nyang hindi naman ito pinag-ukulan ang pansin ng mga gumawa. hindi pinag-ukulan ng pansin ang gumawa dahil alam naman nyang hindi ito paguukulang pansing basahin ng nagpagawa.

bakit pa nagpa-research ang teacher, in the first place? dalawa: hindi nya alam itinuturo nya o hindi nya alam magturo. o parehas

sa internet cafe malalaman mo na ang sinundan mo’ng gumamit sa computer ay:

Wednesday, April 27th, 2005

1. Isang bakla - kung ang ‘gas-lift’ ng upuan ay nakataas ng todo.

2. Nanood ng porno - kung basa ng pawis ang mouse.

3. May kasama at gumamit lang ng isang computer - kung puno ng fingerprint ang screen ng monitor (oily pa)

4. Dalawa o mas marami at tag-iisa sila ng computer -  kung may palmprint, maliban pa sa fingerprint, ang screen ng monitor (mamantika din).

5. Mahaba ang buhok - kung mahaba ang buhok ang naiwan sa headset

6. Nasaktan sa pag-alis ng headset - kung kulot-kulot ang buhok na nakaipit sa headset (iba naman ang kaso ng maiksi at kulot na buhok sa keyboard. Ito ay maihahanay sa item # 2.)

note: kung may iba pang karagdagan paki…kuwan na lang dito.

about those naked tribes

Wednesday, April 27th, 2005

I once watched on national geographic channel a documentary on one of the last discovered tribes…and they’re naked. I wondered if being naked came with being uncivilized. On the contrary, maybe they’re more culturally advanced, beyond the grasp of anyone’s modern-day idea of decency. But of course, this is me ‘assessing things’, from my side. I presume that to the “discovered tribe” the appearance of their discoverers, who showed up ridiculously covered with only their limbs and head exposed was threatening and must only be treated with hostile suspicion.

The explorers, who looked anything but friendly, had a lot of making-up to do in trust-winning considering that their only credential to show-for was that of their predecessors’ brief but fatal encounter with this tribe. Either, that, they were better at convincing this time or maybe the natives were just in a hospitable mood, their wish was granted when they were finally allowed into their community who never had an outsider as an observing guest, let alone a Caucasian.

Credit it to the wisely-chosen gifts they offered such as the jungle-handy machetes. But I think that what really convinced the tribesmen that these men’s intentions were peaceful–if being entertained was the only determining factor- was the photographs.

Ever-reliable, its ice-breaking, friend-winning qualities makes me wonder how the Philippine history would have been different. Most probably Magellan’s life would have been spared had photographs been available during his time. We have long since taken for granted, if not completely abandoned, the amazing simple visual pleasure of looking at one’s own image on a little piece of paper… An interesting part of the consciousness package is the ability to enjoy one’s own image…have you seen an orangutan in front of a mirror? But one obstacle any anthropologist must overcome, like in this particular situation, is how to take photos of your subjects who are suspicious of you and your motives, and on top of that, are known to be fierce warriors. Imagine yourself as the photographer trying to get them lined up (Communication will prove to be the least of your problems). Then you take out this hideous object and you aim it towards them. So far, Needless to say, this sequence does have an uncanny resemblance to one as being led to a summary execution… Now I realize that it was not for recognition, nor was it some kind of trophy for every white man who is included in the photographs of his native subjects. It was, plainly, a gesture of reassurance.

As if the ‘tree of knowledge’ became a man, one of the members of the expedition- upon seeing the naked men -frantically covered them and mumbled something about shame. For all they know, in the eyes of these naked men and women, the clothed men are the ones who do not know the meaning of shame. In the eyes of these naked men and women the clothed men and their purpose of being there is an utter blur.

Imagine reversing the situation just to have a glimpse of how they felt then.

Imagine it happening to me: A stranger- whose physical appearance I’ve only heard of in legends and folklores who were known to voraciously consume and steal resources from our land - approaches me and offered a gift, say a computer ( on basis of indispensability the computer is like a machete for a man in the forest) and food. Puzzled and confused I refused…naturally, especially on the food. To reassure me that his motives are pure he took some and ate it (All the while were communicating via hand signals and gestures). Then calmly, he retreated. Did I mention he was naked?

The next day he came back, this time he brought along with him companions who are from my own race but neither do they speak my language. Then one of them, horrified upon seeing me, rushed toward me but stopped at a safe distance and gesturing in panic something I could not figure out. Either he ran out of patience or just that the grave sin that I am committing has become so unbearable to his sight that upon realizing what he was trying to say he was already all over me frantically undressing me, wanting me to be completely undressed as quickly as possible as if racing time before a deity would take notice of my lifelong sin and zap me with a lightning.

Now…You cannot solely blame those natives for clubbing to death the members of the first expedition.